The 5 Regrets on Your Deathbed
By Daniel Dystyler
A few months ago I was talking to someone when the subject turned to "the real importance that professions have in people's lives ." The impact that certain professional activities have on the course of life of ordinary people like you or me.
The argument this person made was that there are professions that are truly important, fundamental in people's lives, and other activities that are not so vital and will not have as much impact.
And for me at least, it's very clear that some professions are explicitly important. The obvious example is a surgeon who operates on someone they know, but there are countless other activities that truly have an impact: an excellent teacher who has prepared students for life; firefighters who risk their lives to save someone; and so on, an endless number of activities that have a real impact (some more, some less) on people's lives: engineers, philosophers, lawyers, veterinarians, police officers, sociologists, activists, journalists, psychologists, among many others.
And that's made me think a lot ever since…
Working with music? Is music important?
Of course it's important, but is it important and impactful at the level of any of the activities mentioned above? Will it change anyone's life?
Before dedicating myself full-time to Wikimetal, I worked in Information Technology, and I did projects that are undoubtedly very important to people's lives . I did projects for hospitals, universities, courts of justice, security departments—in short, projects that undoubtedly impacted and improved the lives of many people.
And now, I'm dedicated to Wikimetal… To spreading… uhm… music.
Actually, just one type of music: Rock. Hard Rock. Heavy Metal.
This has really been nagging at me. Am I doing the right thing by dedicating my professional life to this?
Of course people like music. But is it really that important?
Is wasting time on this a good thing? Is it relevant? Will it benefit people? Does Wikimetal add quality to people's lives? Or are they wasting vital time reading our posts, answering our quizzes and polls, watching our videos, listening to our episodes and music, and sending us comments and emails?
There's a widespread idea that spending time listening to music is a waste. It's not vital. It's not important. It's not food, health, or air. Anyone can live without music. No one can live without water.
Or in other words, the idea ingrained in the mind is, "Imagine reaching the end of your life and regretting having wasted so much precious time on Rock or Metal .
Hmm... Could it be true?
This really bothered me, because I don't want to spend my time creating Wikimetal and encouraging people to waste their time on things they'll regret in the end. More than that: I want to positively impact people's lives!
So this question kept bothering me:
When we're on our deathbeds, will we regret the time we spent on Wikimetal, listening to Rock or Heavy Metal?
And then last week I attended a lecture.
And in the middle of that lecture, the girl who was presenting mentioned a nurse who dedicated her life to accompanying terminally ill patients in their final weeks. She collected countless testimonies from people who were on their deathbeds, about to die, about what they regretted most in their lives.
These are the top 5 regrets people have when they die:
1. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
2. I wish I had stayed in touch with friends more.
3. I wish I had allowed myself to be happier.
4. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
5. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life that was true to me, not to what others expected of me.
I couldn't hear the rest of the lecture anymore.
My mind wouldn't stop "pulsing intensely" (that might not be the right expression, but my synapses were speeding up, my head was spinning, the ground disappeared beneath my feet, and I couldn't concentrate on the rest of the lecture). I couldn't stop thinking about that, about the value of Wikimetal, about liking music and Heavy Metal.
The reason for this "epiphany"? It's very simple. And wonderful. Let's see:
Nobody said, “Oh, I wish I’d spent more time listening to music,” but at the same time, these 5 deathbed regrets are 5 cries for things that Wikimetal and a love of Metal help us pursue :
1. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
For many WikiBrothers, doesn't that mean relaxing by listening to Iron Maiden's "Powerslave" or Metallica's "Master of Puppets" (or any album or song you want)? Or taking a break from work by listening to an episode of Wikimetal?
2. I wish I had stayed in touch more with friends.
Does the encouragement to go to concerts that Wikimetal so strongly advocates help people stay in touch with their friends? Does one of our posts cause someone to share it with a friend they haven't spoken to in a long time (as I constantly see on Facebook, one person tagging another)? Doesn't being an online platform allow friends to reconnect because of their love for music or a particular theme covered by Wikimetal? Have new friendships formed because of Metal? Are these friendships, forged in and by Metal, lasting friendships that can survive 20, 30, 40 years (like my friendship with Nando and Rafa, for example)?
3. I wish I had allowed myself to be happier.
Is it true that research showing that going to a concert, participating in a mosh pit, experiencing that catharsis, makes people live better, more relieved, lighter, in short, happier? Is it true, as Sam Dunn showed at the end of his documentary, that Metal is an escape valve that allows young people of all ages to meet and be happier?
4. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
Doesn't playing air guitar in your room, listening to "Painkiller," help you express your desire to show what you like and enjoy, and who you are? Isn't wearing a Sepultura t-shirt a way to show your attitude and feelings? Isn't the ecstasy of singing "Run... Live To Fly... Fly To Live..." at the top of your lungs, surrounded by friends, whether in a bar or at an Iron Maiden concert, a way to demonstrate your feelings?
5. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself and not to what others expected of me.
That's an easy one... Is there anything more truthful than being a Headbanger? By nature, the Headbanger has already chosen the most difficult, yet true, path. The clothes, the hair, the sound—any of these elements not naturally accepted by society, by definition, make the path more difficult. It would be much easier to adapt to the common, the normal, to what "everyone wears." But isn't "being Metal" by definition "being true to myself and not to what others think or expect ," which is exactly the definition of this regret?
Well… I don't know about you who have spent time reading this text, and spend time on Wikimetal, and spend time listening to Hard Rock music or going to Heavy Metal shows. But for me, the message is very clear and simple:
Spending your whole life enjoying Metal will virtually eliminate the chance of you having any of these 5 regrets at the end of your life, on your deathbed.
Because each of us will have lived a life much closer to our dreams and surrounded by friends.
I am very happy to dedicate my professional life to Wikimetal.
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